Hello caravan!

Yes, I am a caravanist, and the space left by the departing Prelude has already vanished.

The day began with a very scenic drive through the snow-capped mountains of the aptly named Snowdonia National Park. It wasn’t the route my sat nav wanted to go, but tough. Snowdonia is prettier than Newtown. The route was a no-brainer in my book.

The destination was Queensferry in Flintshire, where my blind Ebay purchase awaited. It was a trade-in at Deeside Towing Centre, whose website is broken. That doesn’t matter. They were very helpful and had the caravan hitched up in no time. I handed over £220, and parked up a short distance away to fit a number plate to the caravan (the classy ‘plate gaffer taped in window’ look until I can sort out something a bit more dignified), and towing mirrors to the XM. Easy.

It begins! Ready to drag the new caravan home.

It begins! Ready to drag the new caravan home.

Then, we were away. I was towing a full-sized caravan for the first time, and getting used to a rather fixed view in the car’s internal mirror. I’m not sure if we were constantly climbing a hill, or driving into a headwind. Possibly both. 60mph (on the dual carriageway sections) was hard work. The temperature gauge was rising, though the electric fans stopped things getting steamy. I could smell years of muck and old oil starting to cook nicely on the engine’s surface though. The poor XM was working hard.

To give the poor, shocked XM a rest, I pulled over after a short while in a handy lay-by. I had been clever and brought a gas bottle, water, a kettle, teabags, a mug, a spoon and milk. Time for a brew! Or, it would have been if I had remembered matches. DOH! Fortunately, I had also brought some orange juice, so I had a continental lunch aboard my Abbey GT 212, and munched croissants as I took in the splendid velour and absorbed facts from the handy brochure. With double glazing, an oven and blown central heating (which may now be lacking parts), this is a fancy van.

Croissants and velour for lunch. Stylish.

Croissants and velour for lunch. Stylish.

It didn’t feel fancy every time a truck went past. I was starting to feel nauseous. I refitted the steel wheel trims (because obviously that’s important) and got on my way again, ‘enjoying’ the fact that my XM now felt like the turbocharger and rear spheres had been removed. Caravans are good at absorbing power, and the weight of it was upsetting the Citroen’s usually cosseting ride.

Once up to 60/50 (dual/single carriageway), things weren’t so bad really. As I discovered when hauling the 2CV’s body up to Bradford, it’s actually quite relaxing to travel 10mph slower. Jeepers. How old have I become?! It’s true though, even if 50 is a bit annoying when towing. The XM struggles to pull it with the van attached and the slightest gradient becomes hard work. I was actually having to downchange. I rarely have to do this overwise! I may have pushed things to more like an indicated 55. This felt more comfortable and the sat nav said it was still 50-ish. This did also seem to mean that I didn’t have a queue of cars behind me. In fact, I kept catching people up! Who then angered me by slowing down on gradients that they had the power to climb easily! Ah, this was just like being in my 2CV. I still have angry memories of idiots getting in my way on the Hardknott Pass once, obliterating my hard-won momentum. Er, I digress…

A couple of hours of this saw me back home again, where the caravan seemed to win a new admirer in the form of Rachel. She fetched matches and we brewed up our first mugs of tea aboard our new camping machine. I think we’re going to enjoy it. I certainly deserved tea after reversing the caravan successfully down our narrow driveway!

Home! Where it was very well received.

Home! Where it was very well received. Note wheel trims now fitted.

There really doesn’t seem an awful lot wrong with the caravan, though that could be famous last words. For less than a really good tent, we’ve got a proper roof over our heads, an oven, a nice, comfy bed that isn’t on the floor and Rostyle-type wheel trims. WINNING! The bathroom is a bit of a state, as the roof has clearly suffered from damp. In fact, the ceiling is entirely missing here. I don’t think we shall be using that room. I may try and fix it up though, as the rest of the caravan seems so good. A lot of trim looks remarkably fresh for 35 years old. It frankly astonishes me that retro caravans can be so cheap to buy. Even a shoddy motorhome would be the best part of £2000.

It will be interesting to see how we get on with it. The first camp we’re taking it to is in about a month’s time, so we can get it nicely cleaned up by then. Let’s hope we don’t get too used to it though. I don’t think the 2CV will tow it…

Bye Bye Prelude

Today, I said goodbye to a car of which I really was quite fond of. Yes, today was the day of goodbye Honda.

Honda rear

Preparing for my last drive of the Prelude.

In an ideal world, I would be keeping it. Firm suspension aside, I’m a huge fan of how this car drives. The only problem was that it was hard to justify when the XM is capable of much more – including towing. Then there’s the 2CV Project, and the Dyane (which is still here) and really, this was a classic case of ‘too many cars.’ A feeling very familiar to many of us.

It wasn’t a particularly easy car to sell. Even at just £500, it really struggled to to fire up the imagination of the car buying public. Which is silly. They’re denying themselves a great car. Like the Volvo, I ended up resorting to a private raffle on a certain car forum. Even then, selling enough tickets to get my money back was a challenge, and the first winner decided he didn’t want it anyway! Is this the least desirable car I’ve ever owned?! Given some of the dreadful heaps I’ve had on my fleet, that really is quite bad.

The second winner came to collect today, and seemed very happy with it. Especially the boot full of bonus items, that included two model cars, lots of magazines and a cuddly toy. Not that the collection was entirely without drama…

You see, I’d left the Prelude with not very much fuel in it. I’ve not been using it much as I thought I’d sold it, only to find I in fact hadn’t. That’s ok. There’s a petrol station four miles away. Only when I got there, the pumps were broken. Bother. I now either had to drive ten miles in the wrong direction, or 18 miles in the correct direction. The fuel level was low enough for me to have real range anxiety at this point.

Bank Holiday traffic came to the rescue to a certain extent, as the miserable 40mph we ended up doing along the main road was a major boost to economy. I was tickling the throttle pedal like someone testing a sheet of ice for strength. Nervously, and with as little pressure as possible.

Thankfully, I made it. With superb timing too, as when I left this petrol station, cars were queuing down the road! My timing paid off, as I managed to arrive at the train station to collect the winner very soon after he got off the train.

I couldn’t resist one last drive home, so I hope the winner didn’t mind that. Paperwork was signed, tax was paid for and before I could summon up too much regret, the car was away.

And now, we must say goodbye...

And now, we must say goodbye…

Rob, the new owner, seems very pleased with it, and is currently driving it to London. I hope the traffic gods have been kind. It must go down as one of the better cars I’ve ever bought. Very typical that I should have sold it then!

We’re now in the unusual position of having space on the driveway. Very novel! Though, of course, it won’t last…

Drive safe!

This week has been a pretty bad one on the roads of mid-Wales. In one incident on Friday, four people were killed in a two-car collision. Hours earlier, an elderly lady was killed in another incident in the same county. Today, there has been another collision serious enough to close the road just a few miles from our house – no news on casualties yet. Looks like it was around the area where five family members were killed in a collision not all that long ago.

Driving classic cars can be challenging, but is huge fun!

Welsh roads can be good fun, but danger can be lurking around every corner…

It’s very easy to get blasé about the dangers of cars. We’re told that cars are safer than ever, and modern cars really are very good at masking the speed with which you are travelling. 60mph just does not feel scarily brisk. Try doing 60mph in an Austin Seven, or on a pushbike downhill, and you realise that 60mph really is pretty bloody fast.

Also, those of us who like to drive quickly can get frustrated by slow moving traffic, which means it’s far too easy to take risks. You end up judging an overtake not on the evidence of your own eyes, but with a dose of risk involved. “The road will probably stay clear, so I’ll be ok.”

I know this, because I’ve done it. Once, I almost paid the price for it too. We’re only on about a couple of years ago, when an overtake I’d attempted in my Rover 416SLi went horribly wrong. My expectation of the vehicle was entirely unrelated to the reality, and it just didn’t accelerate as quickly as I’d expected, which left me exposed to danger for far too long. The flashing lights of the van rapidly approaching me suggested he agreed with this diagnosis. I can’t blame him for being pissed off. I would have been. I gave myself a dressing down and it’s telling that the experience still looms large in my mind.

Yet I’ve seen people tackle completely ludicrous overtakes, in entirely the wrong situation. They get away with it due to nothing more than luck. The problem with luck is that it can run out, and you’ll be taking someone else’s lives with you when it does.

Not that all the accidents on our roads are necessarily caused by overtaking. That’s an assumption due to the stupid behaviour I have witnessed. It only takes a moment’s inattention from even a very competent driver and all hell can break loose. A message arrives on the phone (distracting even if you don’t read it, which obviously you shouldn’t), or the CD needs changing, or noisy children interrupt your concentration. I’m sure we’ve all been there, and had to make a hasty correction as the wheels clip a rumble strip or thump the cats eyes.

It’s especially easy to get distracted when you’re in mid-Wales too. The scenery here is beautiful. Here’s the thing though, you can always pull over for a better view of it.

It really does worry me, because roads can very quickly get labelled as ‘unsafe.’ The A44 attracts this comment all of the time. The road is NOT unsafe. Thousands of people manage to drive along it every day without having an accident. Inattention is unsafe. It’s a failure to read the road and conditions that will cause the collision, not the road itself.

At the rate we’re going, the authorities may feel compelled to take action. Already, one section has been made 30mph, though folk seem pretty keen on ignoring that. I got overtaken through that section the other day, even though I may have been doing slightly more than 30 myself (not very much more I’ll concede). But that’s what can happen, which immediately makes the road less enjoyable to drive.

It’s entirely possible to drive this road at no more than the legal speed limit and have a very jolly time, but it does require a lot of concentration and consideration for other road users. If there’s a stream of traffic,  then you have to accept that you’ll be travelling more slowly. That’s ok. There’s always another day. Unless you take ridiculous risks, in which case that might not be true.

My Videos. Top Three for March

I know March isn’t quite over yet, but here’s the three top videos on my channel over the previous 28 days.

Number Three: Winter Range Issues.

This is the terrifying trip I undertook in a Volkswagen e-UP! when I wanted to test its winter range. Just about enough to get to the nearest rapid charger, but only just! This is a new entry at the top of my popular video tree and with only 1700 views, has taken a while to find its feet. It suggests interest in Electric Cars is growing. Rightly so.

Number Two: Land Rover Discovery

Remarkably, this video has now had well over 24,000 views! It has always been one of the top two videos, so its second place is no surprise at all. I still miss that car, despite its many flaws. Clearly, I’m not the only fan of the early Discovery.

Number One: Citroen XM V6

This one is no great surprise either. In fact, it has historically played second fiddle only to the Discovery, so it’s nice that it’s on top for once! In fact, so popular is the XM video that it has now overtaken my BX on/off road test video, with over 16,000 views. Proof that there’s lots of Citroen love out there. Excellent.

In terms of overall stats, the Disco is top of the list, followed by the XM and BX. You can see the full list in order of preference right here. More videos will be on their way in the coming weeks!

I hate camping! Avec solution?

It really has dawned on me lately that I have a severe dislike of camping. I think because of the sleep aspect. It rarely seems to go well.

That’s not to say every camping experience I’ve ever had has been bad, I’ve had some truly magnificent experiences – most often in my tiny Eurohike two-man tent. Amazingly, this little thing first saw use at Glastonbury in 1999, and has since kept me cosy during snowy nights in Scotland, as well as on foreign jaunts to France and plenty of other places in between. For a quick night’s kip somewhere, it’s still ideal.

Last year’s experiment with a CombiCamp trailer tent was interesting. It was certainly delightfully easy to erect and pack away, which is a large part of the appeal after years of tent wrestling. It was never entirely comfortable though, and wasn’t entirely capable of keeping the weather outside – though it didn’t help that the first time we slept in it ended up being in quite a storm! It at least proved that it wouldn’t blow away…

Rachel found it good because, unlike me, she has curves and doesn’t find it comfy sleeping on a flat surface. We’ve tried all manner of airbeds and self-inflating mats, and the conclusion is that they’re rubbish. I can just about get by on a self-inflating mat, but airbeds just frustrate me.

There’s a lot to be said for a bed that isn’t on the floor too. On the downside, the CombiCamp was quite elderly and not in the best of shape. I thought it best to sell while there was still something to sell.

Now we’re approaching another season, and tents are not looking like the answer. Especially while we’ve got the luxury of a rather decent tow car! So, while the Dyane is up for sale and the 2CV is undergoing a rebuild, what better time to get a proper caravan?

Naturally, my budget is tiny. It always is. Can you get a decent caravan for a couple of hundred quid? Well, we don’t know yet. We’ll find out on Tuesday. You see, we have won one on Ebay for £222. It looks like this:

Our new caravan. Well, in 1981...

Our new caravan, brochure style.

Or rather, it did look like that when it was constructed. In 1981. It’s a bit scruffier now, but the description is encouraging. It even has new tyres. It’s up in North Wales/Cheshire and I’m looking forward to discovering just what our feeble budget has bought us.

I’ve not done full-size caravanning before, so this’ll be an interesting experience. I have owned a caravan before though.

Puck ownership not without flaws.

Puck ownership not without flaws.

That was an Eriba Puck that I once foolishly tried towing with my 2CV around the Peak District. It wasn’t much fun and was only the once. I did try a second time, but the 2CV outright refused and blew a tyre. We found the Puck horribly cramped too, so dragging a caravan to the site was painful, and it wasn’t exactly joyous when we got there. It wasn’t around for long.

Hopefully the XM will do a rather better job. With a maximum towing weight of 1500kgs, it really should do. It even has that torque stuff that’s so lacking from a 2CV’s repertoire. Whether the caravan feels worth it by the time we get to an event, who knows. Not that I can get too attached to it really. Hopefully at some point, the 2CV will be ready to ride again. And there’s no way she’s towing the new caravan. It weighs more than she does…

Project 2CV: Thinking about paint

Having once had Elly restored to ‘really very nice’ condition, there’s no way I’m doing it again. ‘Really very nice’ is too hard to maintain with a car I use so much, and for so many things. Like off-roading and rallying.

But, do I go the whole hog and ditch the red/white paint scheme that this car has had from new? I think I just might. In fact, given that I’m a bloody hippy, perhaps it’s about time I had a car that looked like a bloody hippy owned it. Psychedelic man!

After all, there was a time when LOTS of 2CVs looked just like this.

Cool man! Not enough 2CVs like this in modern times.

Cool man! Not enough 2CVs like this in modern times.

Just fabulous. And, should a panel get damaged, you haven’t got to worry about a paint match have you? As the Dyane has proved, there’s a lot to be said for clumsy brush painting too. Quite a lot of that car is in superb condition thanks to the protection of extra paint. Brilliant.

2CV Dolly

Would she attract a bigger crowd with ‘artwork’ paint?

The biggest problem is that I’m no artist. Well, I can do quite nice chunky writing, but I’m not really sure how to even get started on the blank canvas that is my 2CV. I don’t know which paint to use either – I welcome all suggestions.

I’ve also got decisions to make about bumpers. Elly has had that tubular front bumper fitted since 2006, but it’s quite rusty and powder coated, so a paint to sort out. Never powder coat anything. It’s bloody horrible stuff and doesn’t protect steel as well as you might hope.

I know some purists might not like my plans, but there really are enough ‘nice’ 2CVs out there. In fact, dare I say it, hand-painted 2CVs have become far too rare of late, and shows tend to have lines of immaculate 2CVs in near-original condition these days. There are some very notable exceptions, and a friend’s hand-painted Charleston has won its class (all disc-brake 2CVs so 1981-1990) so many times it’s now in the Masterclass with some very, very tidy cars.

A friend's delicious hand-painted 2CV in a shiny line up.

A friend’s delicious hand-painted 2CV in a shiny line up.

Simon’s car very neatly demonstrates that hand painted doesn’t have to be shambolic. It looks ace. I especially like how he’s kept the Charleston theme of the car, and perhaps I can keep the Dolly theme of Elly. I’d certainly like to. What I definitely don’t want to do is cultivate a faux rat look. That’s far too common and, generally speaking, always a bit awful. It’s like immaculate beards. Just a bit wrong. I think I need to print out some 2CV outline drawings, dig out the crayons, and get creative. Perhaps I can ask my nephew and niece for help with this one!

All this thought is down to the fact that progress on Elly’s resurrection has stalled for now. The body has been assessed and we’re starting to get the panels together that will be needed for the overhaul to commence. I’ve no firm feel for timescales, but I doubt much will happen for at least a month or so. Plenty of time to get in touch with my inner hippy artist. Peace man.

Peace!

Peace! Dyane has inspired me to come up with a hand-painted scheme for the 2CV.

Dyane: For sale. Project Over!

I’ve tried to sell pretty much every vehicle I own in the past month or so, with varying degrees of success. The Honda should soon be off to a new home, though I’ve decided to keep the XM for a bit longer yet. It’s so good at so many different things, though I have tried to destroy the clutch by accidentally soaking it in diesel. This is a bad thing to do it turns out. Slippy!

Camouflage Dyane out for a hoon.

Dyane must make way for the 2CV project. Unfortunately.

But this post is to highlight the fact that my extremely eye-catching (camouflage fail) Dyane is now up for sale. I’ve had a really enjoyable time steadily improving this machine, but it still needs further fettling, and I need to focus my energies on the 2CV. There’s a fair bit I need to do to the chassis before the body comes back, and I don’t have anywhere to do the work. There’s room for only one aircooled Citroen in my life!

I put the Dyane up for £1200, but £1100 would take it if I can get a sale this weekend. Obviously, I may be open to a part exchange, though this really is a fund raiser, as well as a space maker.

I think another reason to get rid of the Dyane is that I could really start to like it very easily indeed! The Dyane is so much better than a 2CV in so many ways. I love the extra elbow room, the practical hatchback, the rear seat that’s actually comfortable to access and the doors that don’t flap at speed.

But this year is all about the 2CV. I simply must crack on. I can’t afford to get attached to a rival! So, please spread the word, and let me know if you’re interested. The details are:

MOT August 2016

2000 miles on the clock (so at least 102,000).

Engine overhauled with replacement barrels and pistons.

Original chassis, body surprisingly good apart from lower windscreen panel (club sells a repair section)

Sale includes new windscreen and seal relating to the above.

Engine uses Boyer Bransden points-assisted ignition.

Retro Japanese: The Roadtrip! Video

One of the most entertaining features to prepare for Retro Japanese magazine was our roadtrip feature – which occupies a full eight pages of the first issue. I joined forces with the Classic Car Buyer boys and we assembled our Japanese classics. Chris Hope, editor of CCB, sadly had to substitute the Kelsey Media pool car for his rather rusty Toyota MR2 – the plus side being that said pool car is a 1999 Subaru Impreza WRX! The other cars were my 1992 Honda Prelude, a 2003 Honda S2000 roadster, a 1994 Suzuki Cappuccino and a 1987 Isuzu Piazza. I enjoyed them all, so here’s a sneaky preview of what they were like.

But which one did I like most? Ah, well, you’ll have to get your hands on a copy of Retro Japanese to find out. You’ll also find the full story of our trip to Rockingham Motor Speedway, Prodrive and Silverstone Circuit. Sometimes, work days really are very enjoyable! Apart from all of the getting lost…

 

 

Nippa: Testing times

The mighty Perodua Nippa (née Kancil) has been on the fleet for a full year now and, true to its name, it has become the default choice for nipping about the place. It has covered one long distance trip with Rachel aboard – to Leicestershire and Northamptonshire – but that’s very much a rarity. It explains why it has covered only 2500 miles between tests.

It sounds like it’s barely worth having, but remember that it cost only £300 to buy, does 55mpg and cost £80 (including test) for the MOT last year. I’ve since spent £100 on a full set of winter tyres for it, and gave it a service (the engine takes about 2.5 litres of oil!). This is cheap motoring. Oh. There was one problem. A wiper box seized up and I had to dismantle the mechanism and lube it up.

Still, I was a bit nervous for the MOT, especially as the tester told me only one out of five had passed so far that day. I needn’t have worried though. The only failure point was wiper blades – they had begun to tear very slightly at their edges. So slightly I hadn’t noticed, and I tend to be fussy about wipers!

Nervous times, though only 2500 miles since the previous test.

Nervous times, though only 2500 miles since the previous test.

Including blades, that meant an MOT bill of £66.60. This is still very cheap motoring! Getting the Nippa up on the ramp did allow me to inspect the underside, and I’m going to have to keep an eye on things like the sills. I can see bits of surface rot starting to bite their way in. I need to get a fresh batch of rust converter. Corrosion remains the biggest danger for this car and at this rate, there’s a genuine worry about whether it’ll ever reach 40,000 miles! How utterly ridiculous.

Another thing that is ridiculous is the fuel gauge. It was hovering very slightly above empty at the start of the test, and nudging slightly below empty at times on the way home. Panicking slightly, I went at put 21.5 litres of fuel in – the most I’ve ever managed in this car. Thing is though, online spec checkers suggest it should have a 32 litre tank! So, is the gauge hopeless or are the specs wrong? Not sure I fancy finding out to be honest. It’s still stupidly economical. I think it must definitely go down as one of my better buys, despite how much people laugh at me about it!

New camera time

I’ve finally had to admit defeat and buy a new digital camera. Good job the Prelude has been sold then!

My cameras have a very tough life. I’ve currently got two of them – a Canon Powershot SX10IS bought in 2009 and a Canon 1000D DSLR bought in 2011. Both have contributed heavily to the 60,423 photos that currently make up my photo library. Both are very tired. The zoom on the SX10IS clunks badly as it goes in and out, while the 1000D is starting to have focus issues, and is generally suffering from bouncing around in my backpack…

I’ve made the decision to get another superzoom camera, like the SX10. That’s a full-sized bridge camera, with a huge lens and clever fold-out screen. The Panasonic Lumix DMC TZ70 (gosh, these names are so catchy!) I’ve purchased is much smaller, yet has 10x more zoom! I’m looking forward to discovering how such a tiny camera can pack 30x zoom ability.

I’ve already discovered that a full DSLR is not necessary to get good photos. Witness this:

Lancaster at Goodwood 2008

That was taken with my old S3 IS Powershot at Goodwood Revival in 2008. Having the ability to zoom massively without changing lens is a real boon for my ‘shoot anything, anywhere’ approach to car meets. The DSLR I own now has often proved to be a pain. More bits to carry around, and you often find yourself with the wrong lens fitted at the wrong time. I’m not a pro snapper.

The biggest challenge for the new camera will be getting good photos when light conditions are not perfect. That’s perhaps the biggest different between my phone and my DSLR. I’ve actually had photos printed in several magazines that were taken on my phone. In the right conditions, you’d never know.

But, when it’s a bit gloomy, a nice big lens can give much better definition to a shot.

Merc fintail

DSLR delivers better definition. More depth somehow.

The above was taken on my DSLR and the colours just had more depth than a similar shot taken on my phone. A good lens is still worth every penny. Look closely though, and you may see a slight lack of sharpness. That’s been the problem with this DSLR of late. Clarity. I do look forward to seeing how the new camera compares though.

Another benefit of the new camera is that it can film in video too, to 1980×1280 high def resolution, with stereo sound. My poor phone has been doing video duty for a year now, but is starting to prove problematic. It will be interesting to see how the Lumix does by comparison. I’m hoping its light enough for me to use existing in-car mounts. In the early days of video, I used a huge three-sucker mount with my SX10 attached to it. Far too heavy, and it suffered terribly from wobble.

Anyway, you can look forward to trying to see the difference. I’ll certainly have fun getting to grips with it.