Having successfully proven that it can actually undertake journeys of a goodly length, the Dyane has nonetheless managed to acquire quite a To Do list.

First and foremost, it really does need the cylinder heads removing, lapping in and refitting. There’s a very strong smell of fumes inside the car. This is something of a 2CV trait and is because there is no gasket between the cylinder head and the barrel. Things are made worse if the ignition timing is too advanced, as the subsequent pinking – where the spark plug fires before the piston has reached the top of its travel – puts enormous strain on the joint. I have to hope that the head has not become too corroded.

This joint leaks and causes fumes to enter cabin.

You learn as a 2CVer to smell the difference between head fumes and general exhaust fumes. I have one or two leaky clamps so I get that smell too! The cylinder head leak fumes are a bit sweeter. Less sharp. They typically occur when the engine is under high load, with a surge in aroma as you lift off the throttle. Exhaust fumes tend to be at their worse as the car is slowing or travelling downhill on a closed throttle, but in gear. There may also be a popping noise.

The drill is to get the cylinder head off the car, apply some grinding paste and I use a cut-down barrel to clean up the cylinder head. You turn the old barrel back and forth repeatedly, pushing down as you do so. You have to use a barrel with the cooling fins cut off as the fins otherwise prevent the barrel from turning between the pushrod tubes. You have to do all of this very carefully, as the soft, aluminium head can quite easily be damaged. You need to be especially careful when refitting the head to the engine. Ask me how I know…

I’ll fit new ‘spectacle’ seals when doing that, and will inspect all other oil seals and pipes. The engine is still losing some oil, just far, far less than it was. After 625 miles, the level had dropped to about halfway on the dipstick.

Lapping the cylinder head with an old barrel.

The windscreen wipers and washers need some improvement too, and I need to stop quite so much water getting into the car – though I will also try to reduce wet weather use, especially over the winter. I also have clacking CV joints to replace – the entire lower driveshaft needs replacement, so I’ll probably pinch the good ones from the 2CV.

Finally for now, I’d like to go over the braking system. The front discs have quite a lip on them and may need replacement, while the pedal feels a bit firm to me – I may need to check all is well with the rear brakes. I’m not convinced they’re proving as much stopping power as they should.

This all ignores the fact that there are bodywork problems to overcome too. All in good time. I hope!

I’ve been massively busy with work, community bus stuff and trying to keep the Dyane working for longer than five minutes. It has been a frustrating week or two. I’ll try to recap without getting too waffly.

Intermotor condensers are rubbish. This one lasted barely 5 miles.

Ever since I collected the Dyane, it’s had an occasional tendency to ‘lose’ tickover. It starts chugging and struggling and makes town driving nightmarish. The first thing to do was to pinch the known good coil from the 2CV. This made no difference. I then set about replacing fuel lines – I could see that the front ones had degraded really quite badly, and suspected the same might be true on the section above the fuel tank. You have to drop the tank to replace this.

This led to a rare moment on this project. I actually had to buy something. There’s no point fitting second hand fuel pipes. A few quid later, I had some new pipe. The front pipework was no bother, and I took the opportunity to fit an in-line filter. Dropping the tank was a right pain, as the underside was caked in mud. A lot of this went in my eyes. Even more went in my hair and beard.

All the old pipe was degrading, but I doubt it was actually enough to cause any running issues. Sure enough, no difference. So, I set about changing the points and condenser. I have loads of old ones. I was planning to take the Dyane to Cholmondeley Castle, but ran out of time. I’d got stuck because using a timing light to set the static ignition timing, the light wouldn’t go out!

While I was away, a friend gave me a fresh set of points and a condenser. These were Intermotor items and the condenser failed after just a few miles. I had to push the car home. Thankfully not far! When refitting an old condenser, I discovered that the connection to the point box was really not very good. That was why I couldn’t get the timing light to go out. I fitted the old condenser, tweaked that connector and reset the ignition timing. Result! She runs beautifully again.

This project is brought to you by almost no budget at all.

Throughout this project, I have been raiding my poor 2CV and my parts stash for components. There’s a simple reason for that. I have no budget! I cannot simply throw money at the car, something I think some people struggle to comprehend. “Just fit electronic ignition,” they say – ignoring the fact that buying one would cost me £139 plus delivery. I am therefore hugely grateful to the chap in 2CVGB who sent me a Boyer-Brandsen points-assisted ignition box. I have a similar set-up on the 2CV and it is BRILLIANT. These systems do away with the need for troublesome condensers, and also reduce the voltage going through the points. That means they can last tens of thousands of miles – as the ones in my 2CV have. But you get better starting and cleaner running, just as you do with expensive electronic ignition. I can’t wait to fit it. Until then, I’ll have to keep a spare condenser and tools close to hand.

Having no budget does force you to be resourceful but it is also quite rewarding. I have done LOADS of work to gently improve the Dyane, but it has cost me almost nothing. I even had service items and oil on the shelf (bought in bulk for cost savings). When you live a low-income lifestyle, the luxury of just replacing stuff with new doesn’t exist. It’s a mindset that more people should explore. Naturally, I would prefer to have fitted four brand new dampers, but the truth is that the car now drives much better with just one dodgy old one replaced by a better one stolen from my 2CV. The wheels and tyres were pinched from the 2CV. Low budget doesn’t mean a total disregard for personal safety – the tyres on the Dyane still had tread, but were obviously perished.

For now, the Dyane remains a fixer-upper on the cheap. I think I might like it all the more because of that.

Unsurprisingly for a vehicle that was last taxed in 1995, the Dyane is proving rather a project. Having successfully got it home (somehow), the tinkering began in earnest. I began work last week, but then had to dash off to Anglesey for the 2CV 24-hour race – what an epic adventure that was. I’d hoped to go in the Dyane, but realised about halfway through Wednesday that this wasn’t an option.

After getting back home, I could return to the fettling. Monday saw me achieve a great deal. The ignition timing was set, the alternator wiring was repaired and the wiper linkage replaced. That’s one MOT advisory dealt with right there. Sadly, doing all this just after the 24-hour race was rather a mistake, and Tuesday was mainly spent in a great deal of pain, feeling absolutely awful.

Yesterday, I got the Dyane back together again. The exhaust was blowing, but I needed lunch, needed to go shopping first and the Dyane was going to take me whether it wanted to or not!

Out on the open road!

I did attempt the drive with the roof back, but didn’t even make it off the driveway before it began to rain. Roof back on. Then it REALLY pelted it down! Fortunately, the speedy little wipers were up to the challenge. Thank goodness I’d changed that linkage.

Around town, the stiff clutch and occasional lack of idle proved annoying. I don’t think there’s much I can do about the former, but I will try getting some lube into the cable in case that’s the fault. The idle is likely to be gunk in the carburettor. I’ll have to get the jets out for a clean, and perhaps take the top of the carburettor off to check whether there is muck in the float chambers. I must also fit an in-line filter.

On returning home, complete with new bolts that don’t fit the clamp I was hoping to use (go me!), I discovered that the crossbox to swan neck joint was completely loose. No wonder it was noisy! If you imagine the sort of hideous noise a Harley Davidson makes, it was like that but (if you can believe such a thing) even worse. Accessing that clamp on a Dyane is a right pain, but I found that reasonable access was on offer if I removed the nearside front wheel. So, while doing that, a good time to put grease in the kingpins eh?

The pin refused to take grease. Probably because old, hard grease was clogging everything up. So, now I had to get a blowtorch to gently warm the kingpin housing. I removed the grease nipple and watched a hideous stream of manky old grease ease out. Then I could finally get fresh grease in.

And that’s what this car is like. One job inevitably turns into several jobs, and every job seems to throw up issues of some kind! This is what happens with cars that have been off the road for some time. At least it’s giving me plenty to write about!

Other issues I know are on the horizon are a clattering CV joint (only occasionally), a possible sticky front brake (nearside) and I need to see if the engine is still losing oil. I’ve replaced the crankcase breather in the hope this’ll encourage oil to stay inside. I’m just over a week away from a long trip to the Cholmondeley Castle classic show, so need to keep tinkering away!