I really dislike servicing cars, mostly because I seem to be completely unable to do it without spilling horrible liquids all over the place. Thankfully for my driveway, I learnt long ago that putting cardboard down beneath the car is a useful way of capturing most of the spillage.

The XM has covered 10,500 miles since its previous service last summer, so it really was time to do it again. The oil was dropped, most of it going into the catch tanks (two because the capacity is over 5 litres) and quite a bit over the sump as I removed the oil filter. Situation normal, but at least I managed to avoid getting oil drippled down my arm. It must be said, there are worse places to carry out a service too. Look at that view!

Not a bad spot eh?

With the oil dropped and a new filter in place, I could fill the engine with lovely, fresh oil. Comma Oil‘s website recommended its 5w40 Syner-G oil. I wasn’t going to argue and while 5w feels like water at cold temperatures, it should firm up nicely with engine heat. The lower cold rating should allow for happier starting during the winter. I look forward to testing this.

Syner-G oil from Comma, as recommended.

I then replaced the air filter, which is simplicity itself. The fuel filter turned into an utter debacle though. The box size worried me for a start, as the new filter looked shorter than I remembered. I foolishly went ahead and pulled the filter housing apart, spilling fuel all over the sodding place as I did. There may have been cursing, especially as I’d arranged a catch can specially – then missed it. I wiped up the mess as best I could, cursed again when I realised just how spectacularly wrong the new filter was, and then had to just refit the old filter – which fortunately seemed in good order. That’s reassuring, as I have experimented with vegetable oil on this engine – which it didn’t seem to like. Certainly, there were no bits of gunk in the canister this time. I recall there were last time I did a filter change (I somehow avoided too much spillage that time).

All this faffing about lost me time, so I haven’t been able to check the rear brakes as yet. I know the pads are a bit low, because they have been for about 13,000 miles so far. Not desperately low, but I do keep a set of pads in the boot just in case! I’ll try to find time to do that next week. I know the front brakes are ok, as I’ve just overhauled them. Similarly, I’ve kept an eye on other areas of the car. I do need to do an LHM change and filter clean, but lack the necessary tool for the pipe connectors. I’ll leave that for another time rather than destroy the clips.

But, I really did need to give the poor girl a wash. It’s only a few weeks since it was last done, but she was quite grim! Not now.

Sparkly clean!

I’m annoyed to have added another scrape to the many the previous owner had already put on this car. While in Yorkshire, I failed to spot a stone jutting out of a bank as I squeezed past a car that looked like it was going to stop for me, but didn’t. There’s now a scrape just above the bumper on the nearside front wing. Oh well. At least there are plenty of other scars already!

I don’t like to leave a car sitting after a wash, as the brakes benefit from a good dry out. Also, after a service, it’s a foolish man/woman who doesn’t go for a test drive. I’m glad I did, because it revealed that diesel had made its way onto the clutch plate. BOTHER. Or similar, possibly stronger words applied, as the revs shot up as the boost kicked in.

I dashed back home, splashed Jizer degreaser all over the engine, and hosed it off. I did this twice and went for another drive. Still slipping, but less so. By feathering the throttle, I could avoid slippage. Those ‘manual traction control’ off-road skills were coming in useful!

Steam! Trying to wash away the diesel.

I’m now very glad that I did this job after hauling the 2CV’s body to Bradford and not before. Getting up the M62 with a slipping clutch would have been a most frustrating business! I now hope I haven’t finished this clutch off completely. I suspect it could be the original, and no, I really don’t fancy having to change it.

On the plus side, the engine bay looks a lot cleaner after the degreasing session! Still, it has been a very frustrating afternoon as once again, a simple service proves anything but.

So, I haven’t quite got the XM’s brakes sorted, but I’m getting closer! The offside front caliper has a new slider and boots and new discs and pads have been fitted both sides.

XM fettling frustrated by weather.

It was an absolute sod of a job that just ate up hours like you would hardly believe. Especially as rain often interrupted play. Ok, so some (er maybe lots) of time was spent hunting for tools – I’ve come to expect this. But an awful lot of time was lost just faffing about with stuff. Winding the pistons back in to clear the new pads was one such task, though that became a lot easier when I discovered that a 3/4″ socket fits on the piston, so you can wind it back in with a ratchet and apply the necessary pressure for the piston to go back. Certainly a lot easier than trying to wind them back in with a screwdriver.

Fitting the new slider seals was a pain too, and I’m worried that I’ve actually managed to damage both seals as I was fitting them. Frustrating. However, the protection is still better than it was. It’s been an interesting learning experience.

Yet, there is a problem. The offside caliper’s parking brake mechanism is simply not functioning. A fairly simple set-up apparently, so when it stops raining (oh please stop raining!) I’ll have to get the wheel off and have another go.

But it’s all rather frustrating. This job was really a complete faff only because the XM uses single-pot calipers. I’m sure the brakes would be far better AND far more reliable if twin-pot calipers were used. Then there would be no need for sliders and there would simply be less to go wrong.

In a conventional car, twin-pot calipers can still cause issues, as the pistons can seize in the pots. Not so much of an issue on a Citroen. Why is that? Simply because LHM is the best brake fluid in the world.

Seriously, I have no idea why DOT fluids are used. Why could it possibly be better to use a fluid which not only absorbs moisture (which then rots out brake lines and caliper pistons) but which will seriously damage bodywork if spilt? LHM does neither of these things, which is why issues with pistons seizing in the caliper are so rare.

It is kind of indicative for me of the general decline of engineering in the 20th century. We invent something as excellent as the disc brake, then spend the next few decades cheapening the design to make it less efficient. Go humanity!

If all the brake faff wasn’t enough, I then decided to replace the bulb in the clock. This required me to remove half of the dashboard and was also a stupid, annoying, fiddly job. This really does highlight that manufacturers really don’t care if a car becomes difficult to work on. It’s not on the design brief. That for me is another failing. Why would you design something that needs maintenance to be horrible to work on?

All this just to change the bulb in the sodding clock!

I suppose I should consider myself lucky. It is at least possible to change a headlamp bulb without having to dismantle the entire front end of the car. Sometimes, old cars really are best.

Anyway, here’s my latest video covering the above!

I’ve got a seriously busy workload at the moment. It’s great! I look forward to telling you more about why that is in the new year. However, it is causing me to struggle for tinkering time. I somehow found enough moments in the previous week to rip the Dyane’s engine apart, but the only reason I was working on the Dyane is that it’s in my garage. It seems to have been raining here for weeks, so working on the ‘big’ cars of the fleet is just a complete no-no. That’s a shame, as there’s plenty I could be getting on with. Like the XM’s sphere change.

As you’ll recall from a previous post, I’d run into issues trying to replace the rear centre spheres (months ago!) but a specialist had managed to crack it free for me. When I woke up this morning, it was actually not raining so after enjoying a few minutes of wondrous surprise, I got up and went straight out to work on the XM.

Essential early morning workout.

The centre rear sphere lives up above the exhaust, under the rear floor. So, it was out with the ramps, suspension on full and nervously reverse the XM up the ramps (they’re about as wide as the tyres are). Then I could crack the sphere off, which would have been better if I’d cracked it the right way first time around. Hey ho. Once I forced my non-breakfasted, very sleepy brain to work out which direction the sphere should turn, it quite easily turned a few milimetres. Now I had to drop the suspension and release the system pressure by undoing the screw on the pressure regulator. This is buried right down the front of the gearbox and is best accessed from below – not an option when the nose of the car is now millimetres from the ground. I had to go in from the top. Which makes a frustratingly fiddly operation as you can’t actually see it.

Not as frustrating as trying to undo a sphere underneath an XM which is on its bumpstops, even if it is on ramps. You see, the human arm just doesn’t bend in quite enough places for you to get your hands where they need to be. Cue lots of wriggling, a lost hat and a fair amount of swearing. The neighbours probably prefer it when I have a lie in…

Eventually, I got my sphere removal tool in place once more and off it came. Almost straight into my face in fact. Naturally, LHM (liquid mineral oil) began dripping everywhere and I’m pretty sure quite a lot of it was mopped up by my hair. I chose not to shower BEFORE this activity with good reason.

Then it was a simple case of lubing the new seal, then trying to fit it in the dark, then trying to fit the new sphere without dislodging said seal. Still in the dark. While not having my hand in quite the right place. And every time i dropped it, it plunged towards my face (saved by the exhaust!).

However, I was soon able to tighten it up hand-tight (all you need) and then it was another frustrating root around the lower reaches of the engine bay to do the regulator screw back up. Then I was able to start the engine, select high and watch the car lift itself gracefully into the air – something it seems much happier to do after this sort of a job than any BX I’ve ever owned.

Alas poor sphere…

I had a peek under the rear, just to make sure there were no signs of escaping LHM, topped up the reservoir (every time you remove a sphere, you lose a little LHM) and dropped the car to normal height. I then gave the rear corners a good bounce. Wow! Floaty!

Back up on high, off the ramps and I was able to go for a test drive. Now, I’ll concede that it still isn’t brilliant – no strut-equipped Citroen ever is – but the ride certainly seems more refined. Still not great over really rough terrain, but out on the open road, it wafts as it should! Going over crests, you feel the car just float back down to its regular running height in a way no coil-sprung car can match. I’m quite seriously pleased. Now I’m STILL trying to find a caliper slider kit (for less than the £50 Citroen wants for what is a pretty small bit of metal) so I can finally overhaul the brakes. Another frustrating business!